| Barack Obama as David St. Hubbins. | After all, Obama is pitching himself as an unusual saint, so why not? |
| Hillary Clinton as Nigel Tufnel | Their love/hate relationship drives the story. |
| Al Gore as Derek Smalls | Because global warming will leave us all like lukewarm water. |
| David Plouffe as Ian Faith | Unsung hero of the show. He's the adult in a room of children. |
| Nancy Pelosi as Jeanine Pettibone | Because I'm pretty sure she's got dubly in it somewhere. |
| Michael Moore as Marti DiBurgi | Because he's made a career out of fake documentaries. It should come naturally to him. |
| Keith Olbermann as Artie Fufkin | Because who wouldn't want to watch Olbermann begging to get his ass kicked? |
| Bill Clinton as Mick Shrimpton | Because as long as he has sex and drugs, he can skip the rock and roll as well. |
| Howard Dean as Peter James Bond | Because blowing up onstage comes naturally to him. |
| Joe Biden as Joe Mama Besser | Another in an endless stream of faceless replaceable parts |
Yeah, I'd pay money to see that one...
