Stability For Our Time

This morning when the doctors made their rounds, they were very excited about Luke's progress. I could tell because one of them almost cracked a smile. Luke's vent O2 had been reduced 30% overnight and he was breathing 50% O2 and his sat looked great. The doctors are ready to wean him off his sedation and to start waking him up. They are eager to begin doing neurological assessment and find out what, if any, damage the prolonged hypoxia did to him. Luke has several advantages going for him. He's young, which means his brain is still developing, which means any rehab needed should be very successful. Also, he was very heavily sedated during the crisis, which should have reduced his brain's O2 requirement. His biggest advantage however is that God is driving this train, and I believe He won't stop until Luke is completely well.

If all goes as planned tomorrow, Luke will be moved from the prone bed onto a standard hospital bed. He'll have his endotracheal tube replaced by a tracheotomy tube, he'll finally get the CT scan they've been waiting two weeks for, and they'll get him to begin to wake up for the first time. It's an ambitious schedule, and while I'm excited to see him making so much progress, I'm a little bit nervous about pushing too far too fast, but I know God has things under control.

It was kind of funny today. I've spent more time with Luke over the last three weeks than I have in probably all of last year. Between school and his girlfriend, I don't get to see much of him. And fathers don't generally get a lot of physical contact with their kids after a certain age. As they grow up, a quick manly hug or a handshake replace holding hands, brushing their hair out of their face, and kissing boo-boos to make them better. As I sit beside him in the ICU, I find myself touching him like I did when he was little. I place my hand on his chest, so I can feel his heartbeat, and his lungs move as he breathes.I hold his hand, feeling his pulse just beneath the skin as I talk to him about yesterday and tomorrow. I rub his back while I tell him over and over again about how much I love him and how proud I am of him. Every now and then, because he can't stop me, I touch his feet. What's really strange is that even though I've spent hours talking to him, touching him, or just sitting with him, I'm really starting to miss him. It's been almost three weeks since I've heard his voice or felt his hug.It's been nineteen days since I heard him laugh or saw him smile.

That's too long.

On his third day in the ICU, Luke's girlfriend Lindsey brought in a small stuffed penguin, It was a bit ragged and held together with duck tape where the dog had gotten hold of it. Her mother Sandy explained the significance of the toy. Luke and Lindsey had been watching a TV show about a certain species of penguins that mates for life. The show followed two penguins that mated, then were separated. One wound up in a zoo, while the other remained free. Years passed, and the pair did not mate with other penguins. Then fate intervened, and the free penguin was captures, and brought to the same zoo. The two penguins recognized each other, and the next season, they mated.

Luke looked at Lindsey and in all seriousness asked her, "Will you be my penguin?"

He'll probably kill me for telling this story, but that's my boy in a nutshell, and that's why I'm really missing him.

Lord, let him wake up tomorrow and still be that kind of a man. And while you're answering prayers, make me more like him please.

Amen.

Beautiful story. Our thoughts and prayers are with you. Hoping you have a wonderful father's day - you are an amazing dad with an amazing boy.

Rich, I did not know about this until about an hour ago. There's a candle lit at the Cathedral of the Assumption here in Koper, Slovenia for your son.

One dad to another....

--toby

My prayers and thoughts go out to you and your family and your beloved Luke. Please know that you'll be thought of tomorrow on Father's Day by me and my family.

Hoping you get to the other side of this soon so that penguins can be penguins and parents can hold their children as was intended.

via Katie's blog to you & sending your family the best best wishes for your boy's recovery & the chance to spend much more time together laughing over penguins.

Hope your prayers are answered and that you get the best Father's Day present ever.

via Katie's blog - prayers for healing for your precious Luke. Prayers for strength, health and energy for you and yours. Our family is praying for a miracle for your family. G-d is faithful.

May God bless your family. Luke sounds like a wonderful son, and you will be holding him again soon. We add our prayers.

Keeping you and your son in my thoughts. I love the penguin story.

Sending you, Luke and your entire family LOTS of love and prayers.

You and your precious son are in my thoughts and, especially, my prayers.

via Katie.

Sending our best wishes and prayers that Luke continues to make good progress.

Referred to your blog by Katie Granju. I have a son that's 18 and have been very reluctant about the driving things. But I will eventually have to give in...

Prayers for you and your family through this process....it's in God's Mighty Will.

Rich, love and peace to you and your family. Found you through Katie, hope things are improving for you both. Your son sounds like the kind of boy I hope my daughters date when they are old enough (I am thinking around 30).

here via KAG.

i will light a candle for Luke and your family.
and be checking up here to see the healing.

with warmth from the flame,

erika

I'm so very sorry to hear of your son's accident and his physical struggles since that time. I hope that at today's end much progress has been made.

You clearly find comfort and strength in your faith. I certainly do not envy your situation, but I do envy your strength of faith in a time of crisis.

I hope to read an update with positive news soon.

Another passenger on the Katie Granju Express ...

Rich, I hope you get your Father's Day wish, and that Luke's recovery, no matter how gradual, will one day be dubbed complete.

Power to the people, from a fellow parent out NYC way.

Dear Rich, I hope and pray that you have much to celebrate on Father's Day. I will hold you and Luke in my prayers and my heart. It is so excruciating to see our children in pain. Take care.

Another mom via Katie -- Keeping your son in my thoughts and hoping your son recovers smoothly and SOON! Happy Father's Day!

so many prayers going out to you and your family. wake up, baby!

Rick, I found your blog thru Mamapundit's... my heart breaks for what you are going thru, and I will begin praying every DAY for a full recovery for your son. Stay strong and optimistic as you are. After reading your posts- I don't think you have to worry about being a bit more like your son- sounds like he inherited his genuine heart from you. I hope you are able to find some comfort this Father's Day- I have no doubt you are very loved. You, your family, and especially your son are in my thoughts and prayers!

So sorry, RicH, not RicK (this is what I get for not previewing )

I'm another who came across your blog via Katie - just want you to know my prayers are with you and Luke and that your faith through this time is so inspiring.

I also found my way here from Katie's blog.

Sounds like Luke learned to be a tender hearted loving boy from you. What a moving post.

My prayers are with your family for Luke's full recovery.

found my way here from Katie's blog as well. My prayers are with you and your family.

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